rolling dice

now i'm jumping on the questions again, losing all my senses again - i'm a rolling dice and i don't think twice, i gave my heart away

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Wednesday, September 23, 2009 / 10:57 PM

But I managed to figure out something;

The only reason I act cold and push you away sometimes .. is my little subconscious test. It's to see whether you'll push through the coldness and find the warmth. If you'd break down the barrier to meet me. If you'd stay no matter how tough it was .. or would you just leave and give up?

From what I've witnessed, seems like you'd just give up. I'm forced to give up my own game. I'd never want to see you leave, know that. I've never meant to be cold to you purposely.. But recently.. I guess I have maybe? But it's my form of defence.. I'm too hurt to look at you. Your eyes melt me and I'd fall all over again. But seeing how .. all of you would never be mine. Hating myself for not realising any of this earlier. I've missed out now..