You're a cute cupcake :]♣
Sunday, September 27, 2009 / 1:55 PM
Song(s) Of The Past Few Days :: Dark Oscillators - Stereophobia
Sidney Samson - Riverside
Story Of The Year - Until The Day I Die
Elliott Yamin - Wait For You
Elliott Yamin - Can't Keep On Loving You
Elliott Yamin - Fight For Love
Elliott Yamin - You Say
Eliott Yamin - This Step Alone
Elliott Yamin - Don't Be Afraid
Elliott Yamin - Never Let Go
Esmee Denters - Getting Over You
Colby O'Donis - Hard 2 Let U Go
RJ Helton - Missing You
Aaron Carter - Let Go
Nick Carter - Funny Face
Big Bang - Stay
Evan Rogers - Candles In The Rain
Evanescence - Call Me When You're Sober
The Fray - You Found Me
Good Charlotte - Misery
Good Charlotte - Broken Hearts Parade
Drew - Like I Always Do
Lady Gaga - Papparazzi
Linkin Park - Lying From You
Linkin Park - Numb
Linkin Park - Leave Out All The Rest
Natz Da Pinoy Rapper - See You Smile
New Found Glory - The Glory Of Love
One Republic - All The Right Moves
Short Stack - One Step Closer
Short Stack - Drop Dead Gorgeous
Stevie Hoang feat. Mr Smith - Before You Go
Taylor Swift - Love Story
Taylor Swift - The Way I Loved You
Utada Hikaru - First Love
Utada Hikaru - Apple And Cinnamon
Utada Hikaru - Come Back To Me
Utada Hikaru - Merry Christmas, Mr. Lawrence
Utada Hikaru - Taking My Money Back
Utada Hikaru - This One (Crying Like A Child)
Utada Hikaru - Simple And Clean
Vanessa Carlton - Thousand Miles
Varsity - Bad Habit
Varsity - Picture Perfect
Varsity - Vanished
Varsity - Love Song
Varsity - Used To Be Lonely
Varsity - All Of Me
Varsity - Babysteps
Varsity - What I Really Wanna Say
The Veronicas - Revenge Is Sweeter (Than You Ever Were)
The Veronicas - 4eva
The Veronicas - Take Me On The Floor
The Veronicas - When It All Falls Apart
Wil Guice - I Love U More
Pitbull feat. Frankie J & Ken-Y - Tell Me [Remix]
Usher - His Mistakes
Yellowcard - Everywhere
Yiruma - Kiss The Rain
Yiruma - If I Could See You Again
Yiruma - River Flows In You
Unknown - Afterthoughts
Deestylistics - Be By My Side
Deestylistics - Last Cry
Deestylistics - I Still Love You
Deestylistics - Since You Left
Stevie Hoang - Addicted
Westlife - Why Do I Love You
Current Media :: GOMplayer - Friends
Windows Media Player - Music ♪♫
Current Mood(s) :: Negative.. Lonely. Confused.. Depressed.. Weird :S? Weak .. Scared .. Annoyed .. Abandoned .. replaced .. Forgotten .. Trying to stay strong .. Yet at the same time, genuinely happy .. and I think I'll be okay .. I've fallen a lot.
Sorry for the lack of posts recently! .. Not that anyone reads here :L.. I don't think? Lol.
But I haven't had any motivation .. and I'm unsure of what I'm really going write .. It's been sucha mess for me lately.. And maybe .. what I write might hurt you in some way? I don't want to do that, so I reframed myself from writing for a few days.. Gomen ne?
But right now you're on a far away trip .. and I'm really, really bored so I am going to write now :)
Enjoy the update? Lols.
Let's start with Thursday. I can't really remember what happened? Oh right, I had a maths test in the morning D: Man, I don't think I went well :S I know my stuff, but when it comes to tests and that I screw up badly.. I don't know why. Pressure maybe? Who knows lah. So I quickly did what I could and sat there for a while trying to work out what I could, after I gave in my best effort I handed in my test and headed off to the editing crew. I hope I didn't do that bad ): Anyways, in the editing room .. I just sat there talking for a bit I guess? Oh! I remember what I liked, ANDY PANDY was back today ^^ from being sick the past few days .. Hehes.
Ums.. Photography! OH YEAH! JAMJAMS WAS ABSENT TODAY D: Ngaaaaaaaws. Anywhos, we went to photography and we were meant to go out and take some photos, and so we did :) .. Oh yeah, here's where I got annoyed. We went outside to take photos and I saw Kevin ^^ .. since we're on the way to making up our friendship and make it better than before (H) I spent some time talking to him :) .. and he also came up to our Photography class to do some printing. And I sat there talking to him for a bit, and it was fair good. But whenever I turned around to you, you gave me this attitude that told me to keep away. Then you just ended up leaving .. And yeah I'll rant about it later (Y). What else? I sat there talking to Kevin for a bit more and it was good .. Lols. Then recess came :)
At recess, I don't know.. Lol. But after recess was PE. And I didn't wanna go cause I didn't do my assignment :S but yeahs. It was me, Krystal, Andy and Kenji? in the editing room. I can't really remember what happened at all. I should update my posts daily :S
Lunch .. hm .. another blur. But afterwards was JAPANESE! And me, Helen and Gamen finally presented our dialogue. It was awesome :L. But yeaaaaaaaahs, after that she discussed our test and that's about it. We headed off to the editing room, cause if we stayed she'd make us do more work :L! On our way out, Helen grabbed a Twix, Gamen grabbed a Freddo Frog and I grabbed a MILKY WAY nomnomnom x]! Ahahahas yeahs. Headed down to the editing room but we didn't do much I guess. Umms yeah can't remember what we did :)
Afterschoooooooooooooooool, I headed off to Victoria Square to meet that cute guy I call Alan Tran :) On the way there I borrowed kitty's phone so I wouldn't get so bored and feel so alone. I guess that was a mistake lol? He was looking for me .. and they were also looking for him .. but there was no way to communicate cause he didn't have his phone cause I had it D: .. okay I won't do that again. Gomen ne. Anyways, he made his way to Hungry Jacks peacefully, thank God. I was at Vic Square and saw that babyface and waited for him to catch his bus, talking for a bit :) Later I walked back to get some Qubic and headed back to school where I found out they were all at HJ's while walking back to school and bumping into my beloved Krystal. We went to Hungry Jacks :) and we ate a bit and chilled. Sort've like the old days :) It was fun I guessies.. and later when it was time to leave I caught the bus with the boys and we went to Arndale so Andy Pandy could buy a replacement keyboard :) I also got new earphones thanks to KITTY! Hehes. Yarh, then we headed off to catch the bus? :) It's small things, times and places like these where I think my life has been well spent, when it's with you boys :)
Okay, I can't remember what I did for the rest of the day so I will just go to the next day, which was also the last day of school for the term xD! Here comes Friday!
Friday started off with me thinking I was late and going to the bus stop just to see the bus drive off :S He wasn't at the bus stop either so I thought I had missed it ): .. he didn't end up showing either so I thought I was late and he just left ): .. but but turns out he just slept in, hehe that silly kitty =3 On the bus I sat there enjoying my beats and tunes, nice change :) Been ages since I've been able to do that! Ahahas yeah.
I didn't do my Unit 3 work :S and there was NO way I'd be able to take all the pictures and complete all the work in time .. so I didn't go to Photography and neither did Jams. Instead we all headed to the editing room ahahas, kitty arrived around now as well :) I can't remember what happened .. Oh right. They were editing the video and a few of us were writing in the little black book of that Soonlee dude. I also tagged Gamens legs ;D Lol .. I had to run out a few times. Even though I'm handling it better, it still gets a little too much sometimes .. But yeahs. Krystal and I then took profile pictures of some people :) Han Dol and Rachel. I think that's how you spell her name :L. But yeaaaaaaaah, it was pretty funny xD and I really don't like Han Dol. Lol. Sucha fag. An annoying, cocky one.
In the next lesson, we borrowed Helen's camera and we went to take more profile pictures of people. I was the photographer :D I did Nathan, Krystal, Steveeeeeeeeeeeeee, Gamen, Kenji .. and I think that was it? Lols. It was fair fun :D and yeaaaaaaaaaahs. Krystal went missing? Don't know where she went :) Gamen, Kenji, Steve and I went to sit at the benches. I think this is where I got hella moody. No it had nothing to do with pms --' but I don't like people telling me who I am. I already know that and quite frankly, I don't really care. Yeah I can be a massive bitch sometimes, and put up with it or get the fuck out. Seriously, I don't care. Sometimes you really do talk a tad tooooooo much and it annoys me. Okay, I wouldn't mind if you were interesting and funny, but you really do bore me with some of your talk --' but yeahs.
At recess, I sat around the boundaries of my group and I guess I had a little fun there =3 It was quite a big change, since I don't usually get along with those people but yeahs. It was good :)
Ummmmmmmmmmmmmm, after recess we all headed to the editing room again I think? And we took a few more Brady Bunch style pictures of Nathan and Hashan.. ROFLMFAO HASHAN LOOKS HELLA FREAKY. HAHAHA. And then we roamed around for a bit and decided to do what recycling we could. We did well :) It's so much easier this way. With a group of friends, more fun as well. Hahahas, yeah we ended up doing what we could do and then we went to the hall for that assembly on what subjects we could do now. FUCK YES, I GET TO DO LEGAL STUDIES NOW ^^ .. but I also wanna do another science or maybe even Digital Art =/! I don't knooooooooooow, let's hope I can somehow work this out (yn). Araaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah, SCHOOLS OUT =D I also got my report and I guess I'm disappointed in myself since I knew I was capable of doing a lot more .. =/
Anywhos, afterschool the weather decided to change and start POURING! Man it was so cold waiting at the bus stop :/ Like .. freezing. Even though I had my jacket ==' Yeahs. The bus FINALLY came after like half an hour and we headed off to Samuels house :) We didn't stay there for long, but I guess it was nice. I wouldn't mind doing this in the future, just a bunch of friends hanging out, no need to go out and spend money yeah? As long as we're all together =3 Yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahs. Stayed there for a bit, hanging out, eating and on the computer for a bit and we had to take Helen back to town. It was gooooooooood, after Gamen and Andy left we sat there on the bus chilling out to some tunes :) Kitty & I with our Stereophobia. Helen and her random songs :L I loved the little moments we had :) Just like that. It was heaps funny :L but yeaaaaaaahs. Was good.
After we got to town and said bye to Helen at her bus stop, Kitty & I headed to Rundle to go get some food. We had KFC :) my shout of course. Anywhos, we sat there for a bit eating, and he was so bloody cute. Hehehes. ^^ Yes you are, you're a cute cupcake =3 HAHA. Yeaaaaaaaaaahs, then we went to go catch the bus .. and by then I was hella tired. I don't know from what.. I didn't do much that day, but I was pretty much dead. But yeah, I had a nice nap :) Just every time I woke up and opened my eyes there was a pair of eyes staring right at me. Kinda freaky I must say. :L. Anywhos, yeah, that was the end of my last day of school. But I think when I came home .. I ate? MSN'd for a bit .. and after a while I just got really tired, everything got a bit too much and I went to bed and just fell asleep straight away. Lols. Umm yeah, when I woke up watched tv for a bit and ended up just going to sleep around normal time, quite weird since during holidays I almost always go to sleep a lot later. But maybe I also left because someone was being really mean .. I went to bed with tears streaming down my face that night. But since I was so tired, I almost instantly fell asleep.
Rofls, yeah that was the real end to my day. The next day went quite well, although during the day it was quite dull. Here comes Saturday.
I woke up quite early, but didn't see anyone in particular online when I signed in on my phone so I just went to sleep again. A few hours later when I woke up, saw him online so woke up and had some brekky :) all whilst deciding whether I should stay home or go to his house. With this cold vibe I was sensing, decided to stay home. It was heaps boring .. I ended up just Photoshopping and playing around with new brushes and fonts I had found. There's one picture I made that I'm proud of, nothing special, quite noobie boobie but yeah I like it :) Yeah, then my brother came over late and I didn't get to go shopping so we could buy ingredients and cook. Bleh.. but I guess the night ended well anyways :)
We went to pickup cupcake :) and arrived at Andy Pandy's house. Where Helen and Jams were already there. Already I could tell it'd be good. Everyone that was there that night, I wouldn't want to have it any other way. jASs+ht, simply the best :D Ums, we watched tv and had snacks and goofed around for a bit. It was okay here, but yays. And ums, then we finally ate! Chicken Congee and this Viet Salad stuff. Nomnomnom. Hahas then they ate Longans while I had the flavoured sticky rice thingy ^^ And then cleaned up and headed up stairs to play some Fatal Frame / Project Zero. Helen just went to sleep .. and I was too distracted. But Samuel .. was scarier than the game was ROFL. I mean, the fat guy that just won't shut up and stop screaming :L. But yeahs, I was just curled up in a ball playing around with Kitty :) He's so warm .. ^^ but yeahs. Iono, the rest of the night was just Fatal Frame and random games + tv. Even though it doesn't sound like much to you, dear reader, but these times with the smallest group of close friends are what I live for :) Anywhos, when it ended and I got lift home, I think I dropped my phone in the car D: fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck. But ahahas yeah. I was dead tired so MSN'd for a bit and just went to bed.
That my friends, were my past three days. Chyeah. Now for the rants (Y). What was it? Oh yeaaaaaaaaaaaaah. I don't like people who reply on msn with short stupid replies that take fucking ages. I can't even be bothered talking. I don't know who you think you are, or if you've remembered what you said but you have FAILED. Those feelings have come back and you're not the one to stop them anymore.
We've brought it up many, many times.. but you've never properly explained to me why. You know that I always want you there .. and I do make an effort to keep up both sides of whoever I'm talking to .. but since when the hell do I want you to leave? Since when have I not wanted you there? You may think I want to talk to the other person, you may feel unwanted there? But just having you there next to me is what keeps the smile on my face .. when you're gone .. it leaves as well. Every time you leave I'm left feeling empty and it aches like fuck. But being in your arms is the safest and best feeling I've ever had .. I don't want that to go away .. and that's all I really know and am sure of at the moment.
ALL YOU PEOPLE THERE, okay yeah I know I HAVE to let go .. but please don't force me, it's not going to do anything but make me wanna keep those feelings and never move on. Just let them fade away at their own pace please? If you people know me at all then .. you'd know that I don't like being forced to do anything. I kinda like to rebel against your orders.. So yeahhhhhhhh. Leave me alone when it comes to this ):
Okay I'm gonna stop ranting, because you've probably all heard it before. It's the same as my last few posts and at the moment I don't feel like thinking too much. I'm already pretty down atm. So yeaaaaaaaaaaaahs, hope you all enjoy your holidays! I'm hoping to go to the movies a couple of times and also head to the beach. Just hope this weather clears up a little :) Ohh.. there's a big big list of songs there and I can't be stuffed typing out even a few lines at the moment, I'm gonna go maybe have a little rest, and watch some dramas :D
Byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
