Promise me you won't let anyone hurt you.♣
Friday, March 19, 2010 / 11:14 PM
Yeah I know :/.. I haven't been blogging much these days, but I have a very legitimate reason. I've been studying. And this time, I mean it. I've been staying up to like 2-3am daily now just doing work. Which results to me falling asleep in almost all my lessons. But then again, I haven't really done much these days either. Life's reaching it's lows again, but I'm glad to have those few here with me to bring me up.
Let's sum up the week now, shall we?
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Monday: Don't really remember much happening in school, but I don't think it was that much of a bad day. :) .. Not til I got home anyways. Someone decided to be a jerk, but we'll talk about that later.
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Tuesday: Hmm, not a bad day either I don't think.. but it was alright. Afterschool I met up with ASs and Phu-dawg at Hungry Jacks and watched them play cards. We talked a heck of a lot about many things and it was a pretty damn good day.
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Wednesday: Afterschool I had my eye check. Lol, have you ever had one? It's so creepy. The old man had this mini telescope thing so he could see my eye, and it's pretty short. He had it against my eye and his face on the other end. -___- After that I hung out with the boyfriend for a while and we went home.
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Thursday: Hmm, instead of going to Research Project, I attended the police lecture. It was pretty funny. The police officer was pretty chilled and laid back too haha. After school, I saw the best friend
Alan Tran and I got off at Arndale to spend a little time with him. It honestly wasn't that long, but it was enough.
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Friday: I had to do my English Presentation Oral with the group and like, I couldn't remember the word REFILL. In my head all I could remember was 're' .. and the only word that popped up was 'respawn.' Damn gamers. Anyways haha, afterschool I went karaoke with Steeeeeeeve, Helen, Samuel, Gamen, Phu-dawg and Vuong. It was pretty damn fun. :D Ahaha, then went to Myer Foodcourt to eat and headed home.
So all in all, had a pretty good darn week except for some little mishaps here and there. :)
Lol, wow. You called yourself my best friend for life and there wasn't a moment when I wasn't there for you. There wasn't a situation where I didn't support you. But, when I needed you, I came to you and you scolded me. When I needed support, I ran to you and I got the opposite. What is this? Still, the way I treated you never changed because after all, there were times when
you made me smile. But because of one little joke, that I wasn't even responsible for, you put the blame on me and take this 'friendship' away.
Yeah, so I get angry at this kid for smoking and he happens to be your cousin that you're on good terms with. Wow, can you really blame me? You then come running to me telling me that my best friend has taken a puff and that I should de-friend him as well. I didn't want to, because I was really upset at the time and I really needed him. Besides, he has told me what he's done and he's apologised for it.. I didn't have to wait for someone else to tell me. Whereas your cousin waited for me to find out, and then he apologised. You lecture me about my wrongs, again and again and again. Look back, when have I ever done this to you? When you did something wrong, I let it slide because the result made you happy. When I did something wrong, you immediately attack me for it.
You told me that I was wrong, for not giving him a chance to explain. Thinking about it, I thought that was reasonable.. and I went to give him that chance. But even that wasn't enough for me, nor was it enough for others. Just because you're stressed, doesn't mean you have to smoke. And don't blame your friends for getting angry at you, causing you to become more stressed and continue smoking. Idiot. You knew what would happen, you knew the result wouldn't make you happy, you did it anyway. Those are the facts.
Mm. Going back to this 'best friend for life' character. You also result to telling me I was wrong for being angry at him because he was stressed. It wasn't his fault. Don't 'pick on him' because there are others who smoke too. First of all, those others I never 'picked on' because I didn't really care about them. I'm not close to them, and I am in no position to advise them what to do.
I don't get angry at those who aren't close to me, it's only those who are. Get it? You meant something to me. And lol? I'm stressed too you fucking idiot. If you took just SOME time to pay attention to me, being your 'best friend for life'.. then maybe you'd see. Everything's a bitch. I'm failing in a subject or two, things don't always go so well in the relationship department.. just to name the top two off my mind. But you don't care do you? It doesn't matter what happens to me. Oh wow, he's letting go of a girl. I've told him before, he just didn't listen. Naww, he lost a friend. Honestly? His fault. Why must you only tell me what I've done wrong? You know what, IT'S NOT FUCKING FAIR ON ME EITHER YOU FUCKING DICK.
You told me I was unfair, and that I've changed. That I
favour this person and it's not fair for any of you'se. Lol? Don't make me fucking laugh. Yeah, no fucking shit I favour him. I've known him the longest out of you all, he's been there with me whenever I needed him. Yes, of course he's scolded me before too.. but he's praised me more than you have. He told me what I did wrong, but he also gave me advice on how to make it right. He never attacked me like you did. He had the power to bring out the sunshine and the rainbow after the rainfall. He always had the power to make my day better. I've changed? Okay, who doesn't have? I've probably matured from taking your crap, and you just can't handle that. Is that it?
Aha, I asked you what the point of me being there for you was anymore. And you said there wasn't. That was the moment it ended. I stopped caring, I stopped trying to explain to you my reasons because you didn't care. You never really did, did you? Enough about me, you tried to cause more harm to him as well. You wanted to tell his girlfriend about his mistake. I told you not to, because if she was going to find out.. it would be from him. Then you, you idiot, told me that it didn't matter what I said.. because you make your own decisions. Stop right there. Think about it. You're allowed to makle your own decisions, and aren't I as well? Ignoring him, was my decision as well. So what the fuck are you saying?
I was fine, when you decided to be a bitch to me.. but the moment you tried to harass him, that was when you went too far. I'm someone who's not bothered with the amount of pain or negativity in my life, I'll take it. But do not, I repeat,
do not motherfucking touch those I hold close to my heart. Or you will get what's coming to you.
So that was our story. That's how it ended. And honestly, when I look back to when we shared smiles and laughter, it hurts. If we had never had that conversation, then I wouldn't have decided to make it this way. I would continue to be there for you and support you, despite the way you treat me. I do shed a tear or two (times 100) for what we could have shared in the future.. But now, don't come running back to me. Ever.
To finish it off, just a little something for that best friend, Alan Tran. :) I'm sorry for what you've received because of this jerk. But remember what I've said? It doesn't ever matter what anyone says about you to me, never will it matter. I won't believe anything unless it's coming from you. You know I'll be there with you through it all. :D I'm glad you've got Dao now, and I really do thank her too, to make you happy every moment you spend living of the day. Love you ayeteez!
Oh oh, and the Boyfriend, Steve Kitty Chang. The future hubby ;) hehe. Thanks for being there with me all the time. For being there when I really needed someone for comfort. For putting up with my shit, and for listening to me when something's wrong.. Even when it's about people you really don't care about. iLoveyoubaby(: est. 911
♥
Oh HAHAHA! LOL, you're such a girl :) Yes, I just had to tell the world of blogging. :D He made me personalize my status to ' taken♥ ' because unlike what the MSN status states, I am not 'available'. Seriously, if you ever meet him you'll see how girly and sooky he can be. Nonetheless, iLovehim dearly. :D
